Are You Trying To Kill Me?
by Nashvillefan
Summary: Rayna and Deacon. My take on what happened after Wednesday's episode. May be more than one chapter with some exploration of what might happen for the next few! :)
1. Chapter 1

This story is based off of lasts nights episode, in particular, where it ends. I'm filling in the blanks for what happens when the two lovebirds fall in slow motion onto that couch, Deacon's muscles just popping out everywhere ;)

Nashville  
Deacon sat on his couch reliving everything that had happened in the last 6 hours. Rayna and Liam had performed that song. Deacon recalled the two writing it. They had been in some small town in Alabama. After a fight over absolutely nothing, they had make-up sex against the back of the bus in the middle of the parking lot. Deacon laughed as he thought about it, they never could keep their hands off each other. But somehow that encounter had sparked those lyrics.  
He couldn't get the image of Liam pulling Rayna close, looking at her with lust in his eyes. The touches and looks he used to give Rayna. He couldn't watch any more so he had walked away. And god, then there was Stacey. Why couldn't he have kept his composure until he was in the confines of his own home? But no he had flipped out right then and there. Her words still stung his ears.

"Do you still have feelings for her?"  
"Yes."

Deacon didn't know why, but the honesty was so raw coming out of his lips. He couldn't stop it. Somehow it was like if he said it to her, maybe somehow Rayna would hear him. And then their fight had exploded into the hallway. As he had followed after Stacey, he hadn't even noticed Rayna at first. But he felt her gaze. He didn't look but Stacey saw her standing there.

"I just need time," she had told him, then rolling her eyes "just great," and storming off as she saw Rayna.  
Of course Rayna had to be there at that moment, Deacon thought. Why wouldn't she have been. But making eye contact with her was like his undoing.

"Everything okay?"  
"Uh, Yeah, yeah," be brave and walk away he told himself, but he couldn't, "no, no it's not."  
"Come here," her eyes pleaded with him, as he lets out a shaky breath, "what's the matter"

Just be honest with her, he though, "you," he let out a shaky breath, "I've been tryin forever to fight this thing between you n me, and uh, just when I think I get there," is all he can manage. She looks at him, almost ready to speak when a voice from behind stops them both.

"You ready?" Liam calls to her. She nods.  
"We're goin to St. Lucia together, so, you need to call Stacey, make it right."  
She squeezes his hand as she walks away and he wants nothing more than to beg her to stay but he lets her go.

God, Deacon thinks to himself, you've sure made a mess of this. He continues to think about Rayna, the fact that she is probably kissing Liam at this very moment. He can't shake the sick feeling in his stomach. His thinking is stopped by the knock on his door. He prepares himself to see Stacey with a box full of his stuff, ready to have his key thrown at his head. But he opens the door to find Rayna standing there.

"Hey," she states calmly  
"Hey," he responded, unable to mask the confusion in his voice.  
"Are you by yourself?" She barely whispers.  
"What's goin on Ray?"  
"Well, I was at home packing for St. Lucia and it just didn't feel right. And I know you're tryin to move on with your life. And I'm tryin to move on with my life but," she pauses, tears begin to form in her eyes as her voice cracks with what follows, "I love you, and that's just never not been true."  
He can't believe his ears, "Are you tryin to kill me? What are you doin-are you-2 hours ago you were gettin on airplane with Liam. You told me to get back with Stacey. Now you're standin right here on my porch and you're tellin me this now?"  
She had slipped a "yeah" in the middle of his rant. When he finished so did she.  
"I love you, and that is the truth. And you can do with that what you will. But I needed to tell you, and so I did." She turns to walk away. He knows he can't let her go.  
"Hey," he whispers. She stops and turns, and practically jumps into his arms.

His lips meet hers first as her hands run through his hair. Unlike the kiss in Chicago, there is no hesitation by either of them. Their tongues meet almost instantaneously. Deacon spins them, pressing her against the door frame. He is already getting hard with anticipation. And this time Teddy will not interrupt them. Taking another step to pull them inside, he kicks the door shut.

Once inside they are a flurry of roaming hands. Deacon quickly pushes off her jacket and untwists the scarf around her neck. Rayna reacquaints her hands with the stubble on Deacon's face and the softness of his brown hair as their kiss continues. Deacon's hands have been skating up and down her sides, barely grazing the sides of her breasts. When they both break for air, her hands glide across the muscles in his shoulders before beginning the series of button on his shirt. Deacon follows suit. Rayna blushes slightly as his eyes focus on the newly exposed cleavage before him, as he finished the buttons. Rayna runs her hands up his chest, pushing his shirt off of his shoulders. Deacon's hands glide down her body, resting on her ass, gently brushing over it before untucking her shirt.

Rayna is amazed at how neither have forgotten this routine between them. It's so natural, like second nature. Deacon can't get over his need to feel her body against his.

As Rayna's hands move to his belt, undoing the buckle, he clutches her waist, pulling her flush against him as he leans in for another kiss. His hands travel back up, pushing her shirt off her shoulders. His arms wrap around her and the feeling of her skin against his is enough to make Deacon lose it right then and there. Especially considering the teasing fashion in which her tongue is wandering his mouth. Her hips meet his again, and a slight moan rumbles from her mouth to his. Deacon's arms hook around her tighter as he walks them toward the couch. Lifting her slightly he lays them down.

Rayna shifts below him so she can feel his body full on. Deacon obliges her, pressing the firmness in his jeans squarely against her. The friction between them causes a moan from Deacon. Their tongues are still battling as Deacon decides her bra has got to go. Pulling her to him slightly, his hand travels to the clasp and undoes it expertly. Breaking the kiss, he gazes over her body as he tosses her bra to the floor. Lust overcomes him as his mouth makes contact with the newly exposed flesh. His tongue teases her right breast and his hand gives attention to her left. Then his mouth and hand trade. Rayna begins to grow impatient, especially as his teeth graze over her breasts, driving her crazy. Rayna shifts her hips again and Deacon smiles against her neck.

"Impatient as usual Ray," he whispers  
"Deacon, it's been 13 years, impatient is an understatement."

His hands skate down her body once more, stopping at the button of her jeans. He looks into her eyes once, and sees the lust in her own blue eyes matching his. He pops the button and quickly dips his hand below. The dampness already there makes him smile at her. She returns the smile as her hips shift to accommodate his hand. As soon as her eyes snap shut, Deacon knows she is close. He doesn't want her to come like this. Quickly retreating his hand, he stands, grabs the ankles of her jeans and yanks them off in once swift pull. Sliding his hands up her legs, he grabs her ass and picks her up. Rayna's legs wrap around his waist as she cups his face, pulling him in for a kiss as he carries her to the bedroom.

As he lays her down on the bed, he takes in her body once more, before looping his thumbs in her waistband and pulling her panties off. Rayna sets up, resting on her elbows as she watches him shed his jeans. He begins to crawl on the bed when she speaks.

"There a reason you're leavin those boxers on Mr. Claybourne?"  
"Because I'm not ready for them to be off yet," he smiles at her, pushing her thighs apart. He kisses a trail up the inside of each thigh, before his tongue connects with her most sensitive spot. Rayna throws her head back, she had almost forgot what this had felt like. Deacon is relentless with his speed, pressure, and expertise of what to do and how to do it. Then he adds fingers and Rayna nearly lets go right there. But she holds on just a little longer. When he starts doing the figure 8 motion that drives her crazy, this combination makes her come. A violent climax hits her and she can't remember the last time it happened like this.

When the wave subsides, Deacon stands once more, this time finally shedding his boxers. Rayna watches him, watches as he springs free from the confines of the cotton. She blushes when he catches her starring.

"Forgot how good I look naked Ray?"  
"I really did yeah," she smiles.  
"Well, I don't just look good," he smiles, climbing on top of her once more. He leans in to kiss her, their tongues meeting again. Rayna runs her hands up the muscles in his back, and tangles them in his hair as Deacon's hands find her breast once more. When they pause for air, Deacon looks at her for a moment and she can see the questions in his eyes.

"Make love to me Deacon," is all she says and all that he needs to hear. Once more he spreads her thighs. Slowly he enters her, taking the time for her body to adjust to him. Once it has, his movements begin. Slow at first, and Rayna moans into each kiss she plants along his neck and chest. When she wraps her legs around his waist, giving him more depth, Deacon whispers into her neck.

"Jesus Ray, I've missed you, god I've missed you," he manages between thrusts.

His pace begins to quicken as Rayna begins to match his rhythm. He can tell by the look in her eyes that she is close, and so is he. He gives another thrust, before pulling out almost completely and stopping. Rayna's eyes dart open, pleading with him to continue. He thrusts forward once more, as deep as she will allow, with a slight swivel of his hips. He does this action once more, then twice more, the third time was all she needed as Rayna screamed his name, before biting down on his shoulder. Deacon gave one final thrust and came barreling over the edge, calling out her name.  
After a few minutes, Deacon rolled from his collapsed potion on top of Rayna.

"Wow," she whispered.  
"Well thank you."  
"Oh don't get cocky."  
"Hey, I did good work. But," he rolled to his side to look at her, "You did great work darlin."  
"Hah. I didn't do much. In fact I've lost most of the flexibility you used to love. And that was the first time I've, well, it had been a while."  
Deacon was looking at her intently now, as he slid next to her. As he glanced down at her she smiled up at him.  
"Well, I couldn't tell. You're still an expert at those button downs I wear. But," he paused, "you mean, you and Liam never?"  
"Um no. Why would you think that?  
"Well, Atlanta. That show y'all put on last night. The fact that you were gonna travel to the Caribbean with him?" His eyes were focused but there was no anger in them.  
"Deacon, we never did anything but kiss. Had I went on that trip, yeah it woulda happened. But I came here. I mean, I meant what I said at your birthday, that I, that I wanna do right by you."  
"Oh well, I'm happy to hear that. Never really have cared for the guy. And I'm glad you came here. Because Ray," he paused, his eyes wide, "I've never not loved you either. And backstage today, it took all of my strength not to tell you to stay."  
"Why didn't you?"  
"Because I could tell by the look in your eyes that you wouldn't go. But I had to let you do it on you own."  
"Hmm," she smiled, drawing him in for a kiss. It quickly deepened again. So she pulled away, there was still the elephant in the room. Deacon could see the look in her eyes, knowing what she wanted to ask. He was in no mood for that conversation, so he attempted to distract her, kissing her neck, nibbling her ear.  
"Deacon. You know what I'm going to ask. Lets just get it over with."  
"Fine," he grumbled, pulling himself up to look at her.  
"Stacey. Is she still your girlfriend? What does this, she motioned between them, mean?"  
"Ray, we love each other and we just had sex. That pretty much makes my relationship null and void," he paused, "I like Stacey, and I was trying to build something with her. But I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. And as much as I hate to admit it, I knew all along it wasn't goin to work. Because its always been you Ray. And Stacey knows that too."  
"What?"  
"That was what the fight was about between us earlier. She asked me if I still had feelings for you an I couldn't lie to her."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
My take on the Rayna/Deacon post coital conversation for tonight's episode! Thank you for the continued support. And, I am going to try and respond to each of your final reviews on New Beginnings. But it will take a bit of time, however, I do appreciate them and thank you all for reading!

East Nashville

Rayna had been nudged awake by Deacon peppering kisses across her back, down her arm, and across her chest once she had woken fully. Rayna and Deacon had both half expected the other to regret last night. But neither had a single twinge of regret, the only thing they each felt was complete happiness. And after a few kisses, Rayna felt Deacon's lower half pressed firmly against her hip. The first time her phone rang, they both ignored it completely as their hands began rediscovering one another in the daylight. The second time it rang, Rayna attempted to break the kiss, but Deacon wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. Finally, the third time it rang she broke the kiss.

"Ugh," she grumbled as Deacon rolled to his back, "my phone has been ringing off the hook."

She rolled over to answer it as Deacon sighed. Rayna had just reached the phone when Deacon's arm stopped her.

"Ya know what, no," he stated, grabbing the phone from her, "I've waited 14 years for this, I get you all to myself," as he leaned in for another kiss.  
"Okay, fine by me," she smiled between kisses, brushing her ass against his now hard lower half.  
He pressed another kiss to her shoulder before glancing at the screen.  
"Oh," he paused, "um it's Maddie," handing her the phone.  
"Oh shoot okay," she sighed grabbing it.  
"I'm sorry," he stated, leaning back against the pillows. He suddenly became very uncomfortable. Rayna's daughter was calling while he was laying in bed with her, very naked, very preoccupied with her mother's naked body, his mind full of naughty thoughts.

"Hey sweetie, what's going on?"  
He was amazed at how quickly she transitioned from the lust-filled voice to mommy voice.  
"Oh my gosh awesome!"  
"Awesome."  
The second awesome was far less enthusiastic he had noticed.  
"No honey, I will see you when you get home from school, we will talk all about it."  
He smiled at this, he could only imagine what Maddie was asking for.  
"Thank you for that news. Bye."

She layed back against him, nustling her head in the crook of his neck, draping her arm across his chest.

"I just got nominated for female vocalist of the year."  
"What? Seriously? Congratulations," he smiled, leaning in for a kiss as she giggled against his lips.  
"You made me forget all about the CMA nominations."  
He cocked an eyebrow at her, "I did that?"  
"You are good."  
"I'm somethin else huh?"  
"Yeah you are," she grinned coyly, leaning in for another kiss. The kiss quickly deepened but Deacon had more to say.  
"Mmhmm. You surprised the hell outta me last night," he stated, caressing her cheek.  
"Surprised the hell outta myself," she met his gaze as she ran a finger along his scruff.  
"Wanna get some breakfast?" he smiled.  
"Mmhmm," she grinned, letting him know she wasn't interested in food.  
"Maybe in a minute."  
Their lips met once more. His tongue was eager to connect with hers, but yet again her phone rang. Glancing at the screen she let out a sigh.

"It's Bucky," as she lifted it to answer.  
"He can wait, we already know the news," he grinned, grabbing her phone, silencing it, and tossing it to the floor.

Deacon quickly readjusted the covers, positioning his upper body on top of hers. His lips met hers once more. His tongue quickly met hers, this kiss much more patient and gentle than last night. His tongue swirled around her mouth rediscovering everything he had forgotten to pay attention to last night. Rayna let out a slight moan as her hands travelled the plains of his back and shoulders. They moved slowly, lingering over his muscles. Deacon's calloused fingers had found her breasts again.  
Rayna smiled against his lips as his hand began traveling south. Deacon gently bit down on her bottom lip when his hand found its destination. He smiled down at her as she let out a shaky breath as his fingers started her undoing.

With Deacon still nibbling on her lip, Rayna giggled as she attempted to speak.

"Deacon," she paused, waiting for his hand to cease movement.  
"Yes?" He asked, meeting her gaze, his hand still at work.  
"This teasing is not going to cut it this morning,"  
"Oh? You uh, are ready for me eh?"

Rather than answer, Rayna leaned in, biting his lip, pulling gently with her teeth, as her hand reached between his thighs and grasped him. Deacon quickly retreated his own hand as he attempted to climb on top of her. But Rayna met his motion and quickly flipped him to his back, climbing on top of him.

Her waves fell around his face as she leaned in to kiss him.  
"Takin charge Ray, I like it," he smiled as his hands cupped her face, "but weren't you asking for something?"  
"I was," she smiled, lifting her hips slightly, giving him room to enter.

The next 40 minutes was a blur of some of the best sex either one had had. The image of Rayna above him, head thrown back, her nails digging into his chest would never leave Deacon's mind. For Rayna, the way he clutched her waist, saying her name like a sweet prayer when they climaxed together, was the most visceral sound she had ever heard.

After they had showered, they made their way to the kitchen for breakfast. Deacon cooked his special: scrambled eggs, French toast, and extra crispy bacon. Rayna sat on the counter, wearing nothing but Deacon's button down and boxers. Deacon stood in a pair of jeans, resting between her legs, as they took turns feeding each other, stealing kisses between bites.  
They had just finished as Deacon quickly met her lips with his. He had begun a trail of kisses down her jaw and neck when a knock on the door stopped them both.

"Umm, I don't usually get visits this early," he smiled, placing a final kiss on her lips, "I will be right back.  
Deacon pulled open the door and his jaw hit the floor.  
"Stacey? Uh, what, uh, I didn't expect to be seeing you after last night."  
"Look, I have thought about it and thought about it. And I get it. I'm willing to give you the time you need and continue to work on this. Because I like you, a lot. More than a lot." She smiled, quickly averting her eyes to the floor.  
"So, can I come in? Or what?"  
"Listen, Stacey. I need to be honest with you. When I said I still have feelings for Ray, that was an understatement. I thought that if I could just push em away, and start over with someone else, they'd go away. So I started this thing with you. An to be honest, when we slept together the first time, I didn't plan on having another date after you left. But somethin about you drew me in. So I did an we started buildin this thing. But those feelin's didn't go away. Truth is, Ray is the love of my life. And no amount a time will make that go away. So, I guess what I'm tryin to say is..uh, I'm sorry. That's all I got."

After a moment she finished processing all that he had said. Deacon expected her hand to meet his cheek when she lifted her hand, but instead she reached out and cupped his chin.

"Deacon, I knew from our very first actual date, that you weren't in this. But somethin about you made me want to try. And hearing you say all that just confirms why I wanted to try. When you love, you love with all your heart. It was a sense of comfort for me, hoping that maybe that love would eventually focus it on me. But it's okay."  
"Well, there is somethin else Stacey," he looked down at his bare feet.  
"Okay?"  
"And I'm tellin you this because you deserve to know," he paused, "Rayna is in my kitchen, which is why we didn't talk inside."  
"Oh, so you already knew that we were gonna have this conversation when you opened the door?"  
"Yes, an I'm sorry. But I wanted to do right by this."  
"Alright, well, I can't say I didn't see it coming," she paused, pulling his key from her pocket, placing it in his hand, "good luck, and tell her hello."  
"G'bye Stacey."  
"Bye," she smiled, "and take care of Sue."  
With that she turned and walked down the steps.


	3. Chapter 3

Two Weeks Later

Belle Meade Hospital

Rayna opened her eyes as the throbbing in her arm had returned. Glancing to the corner chair she smiled, he was still there. Every single night of the last two weeks he had stayed here with her. They had not spoken about Maddie. But he had slept here, keeping an eye on her. She knew that was progress of some kind. Thinking back on the accident, she couldn't believe she had broken so many bones. The images of that night still haunted her dreams. When she had chased Deacon into that parking lot, she had no idea that this was how their night was going to end. If only she had followed her gut and stayed parked. But she knew he would have gotten out and walked away. Driving had been the only safe choice, or so she thought.

The ride had been silent at first. But then he had pulled out the bottle from beneath the seat. Glancing over she couldn't believe he was drinking, like this, in front of her. Not that she blamed him, she had driven him to this. Then his eyes met hers. They were filled with so much hatred. So much pain. He finally spoke.

"You happy Ray? This what you wanted?"  
"Jesus Deacon you must be jokin?"  
"Damnit Rayna. How could you lie to me?"  
"Deacon I was trying to do what was best for Maddie."  
"That's bullshit Rayna and you know it," he took another pull from the bottle, "she is my daughter and you didn't think I deserved to know. We could have had a family Ray. It should have been me raising our daughters."  
"Deacon, I had no way of knowing," her voice cracked and the tears started.  
"Don't, DON'T DO THAT," he raised his voice, "YOU DON'T GET TO PLAY THE VICTIM!"  
"God damnit Deacon, I AM," she matched his volume, "you broke me into a million pieces. After we got married and Maddie was born, we did the test. When I found out Teddy wasn't her father, I was torn into a million pieces all over again. You were out of rehab, you were better. I couldn't chance destroying that for you. And besides, look at how you reacted, can you blame?" she shouted the last part, realizing how harsh it came out.

Deacon looked at her again, processing what she had said, then scoffed and brought the bottle back to his lips. This made Rayna even more angry. He didn't get to retreat into the bottle and hide. No they were going to deal with this together.

"Give me that damn bottle Deacon," she reached for it.  
"No Rayna! Pay attention to your damn drivin," as he shoved her hand away.

Her heart sank as she saw the car in the middle of the intersection. Her only thought was to swerve. Then almost in slow motion, she felt the tire blow. Her body was jerked quickly and her shoulder smashed against the window. The sound of glass breaking pierced her ears, then smashing metal. She watched as the ground and sky became one as they rolled, again, again, again, again, and again. Somewhere in the middle, the liquor bottle broke, brown liquid splattering across her body. When all of the commotion stopped, they were hanging upside down.

The dash and steering wheel were crunched against her. She could tell Deacon was yelling something, but she couldn't make it out. Before she knew what was happening, he was pulling her from the car, dragging her to shoulder of the road. When her ears had stopped ringing, he was holding her close.

"Ray, I'm so sorry. It's gonna be okay. You are gonna be okay," he whispered between kisses on her temple. Suddenly overwhelming pain hit her body as she looked into Deacon's eyes. He had cut his forehead, but beyond that he looked fine. As she glanced down at herself, she noticed a large glass shard in her side. There was also what could only be a bone sticking out of her thigh. Glass peppered her hands. She looked at Deacon once more as she began to mumble.

"Ray, I can't, I can't hear you," he yelled, leaning in so her lips were nearly against his ear.  
"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry," she whispered, taking another breath, "and I love you so much."

After that everything went dark. She woke up three days later in the hospital. They had put her in a chemically induced coma to make it through the pain and surgeries. Her worst injury had been the severe concussion, which had led to swelling of the brain. She had also snapped her femur in half. Broken her left arm in 4 different places, one of her eighteen broken ribs had punctured her lung, and the glass shard in her side had done number on her kidney. Deacon had only fractured his hand, and had to have four stitches in the cut on his head.

Coming back to reality, she noticed Deacon beginning to stir. When he opened his eyes, he immediately focused his gaze on her. He nodded, stood and headed for the door.

"Deacon," she whispered, her voice pleading with him.  
"Ray," he sighed, turning back to look at her, "I'm, I'm sorry," he muttered, tears forming in his eyes.  
"You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm the one who has everything to be sorry for," her tears no matching his.

He slowly approached her bedside, never breaking her eye contact. When she nodded at him, he climbed in the bed next to her, pulling her close to him as he began stroking her hair.

"Shh, it's gonna be okay," he whispered, as she snuggled against his neck, wanting to hold him, touch him, feel him. This was the most interaction they had had in two weeks and she wasn't letting go. She continued breathing in the smell of him, his musky cologne. God she missed him. Without thinking she brought her hand up to his jaw, tracing his stubble, before tangling her fingers in his brown hair. When she pulled her face back to look at him, he met her gaze and smiled down at her for the first time since he had confronted her in the CMA dressing room.

"Hey," he smiled, tracing her cheek.  
"Hey," she smiled back.

They both brought their faces towards each other at the same time. Both swept up in their emotions, they just wanted to get lost in one another, if only for a few minutes. Deacon's lips were just millimeters from Rayna's when he paused. He knew he shouldn't do it, but God, he needed to. He needed to remember her lips, remember her taste, remember all the things he loved about this woman. Because they had a daughter, who knew the truth, and they needed to sort this out somehow. After letting out a shaky breath, he brushed his lips against hers.

The instant electricity made his head spin. He continued placing simple pecks against her lips, until his hand found the back of her neck and he pulled her in tighter against him. His tongue traced against the seam of her lips and after a moment, she opened them slightly, allowing her tongue to massage against his. At that moment, it was like fireworks exploded around them as Deacon let out a sensual moan. It was like music to Rayna's ears. He had missed her. She had missed him. In some crazy way, they were each others addiction. Quickly, the subtle, gentle tangling of their tongues deepened as Deacon's hand began caressing Rayna's bra-free breasts through her hospital gown. Instantly, Rayna let out a moan that matched Deacon's. It was this noise that snapped Deacon back to reality. They shouldn't be doing this. Not yet. Not now. They had so much they needed to work out. His hand retreated as he quickly ended the kiss. When they broke apart, he rested his forehead against hers.

"Ray, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I meant what I said. It's gonna be okay. But, Ray, we've got so much to sort out. So much to work through. This is the last thing we need right now."  
"Babe, I love you. I just want us to work through this."  
"I love you too Ray. But there is a lot of pain, anger, and hurt in my heart. I still have so many questions."  
"Babe I know you do. And I want to answer them. I want us to figure this out together."  
"That's just it though Ray, I don't know if we can figure this out together, so much as I need to sort me out on my own," he pulled back to look at her now.  
"What does that even mean?"  
"I don't know Ray. I just know that I get within six feet of you and all my sense goes out the window. I fall back into you, into us. And I know that I lost thirteen years of sobriety because of this secret. I went on a bender that landed you in here. So yet again, I hurt you. And because of that, I hurt Maddie and Daphne. I think I just need space, time, to process, to deal with this."  
"Deacon I get all that, I understand all that. But if we are gonna survive this, if we love each other, and want this to be okay, not just for our sake, but for Maddie and Daphne, I don't think we can do this apart. We were a couple, we can't just walk away from that."  
"Ray, no offense, but you lied to me for thirteen years, I think that makes this extenuating circumstances."  
"Deacon, I lied about Maddie. I hope you can believe me when I say that I did that for Maddie. How was that supposed to work if I had told you, when I was already married to another man? So yes, I lied. But I never lied about how I felt. My feelings, us, music, you and me, that has always been true."  
"I understand that Ray, I get it. But for right now I just don't know if that is enough."  
"Well then, what do you want, hmm? How much time do you need? Because you do know that Maddie asks about you? Asks when she will get to see you. You are her biological father, and like you she was lied to. She understands how you feel, wants to know how you are."  
"I don't know Ray. The main thing I'm thinking about right now is building my sobriety back up. I'm doing an outpatient treatment center. I go everyday for an individual therapy session and a group therapy session. I haven't drank since the night of the accident, but every time I think about that lie, I want to drink. Truth is, it felt so good to down that first glass of whiskey Ray. It numbed the pain. Took away everything. And I kept drinking them. Pushing the thoughts of you farther and farther away. And Ray, that scares the hell outta me. I think maybe Cole was right, you are my addiction. And sometimes that is good, other times that is the worst thing for me. And I think right now, you are the worst thing for me."  
"No," she said boldly, before setting up to look at him squarely.  
"Excuse me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.  
"No. You do not get to pick and choose when I am good for you or not good for you. The fact is, Deacon, yes, I lied to you. And I regret that every single day. I regret not waiting for you every single day. If I could go back and do it all over again, I would bet on you, I would pick you, I would wait for you. Because you got sober. And you got sober for me. But then I took that all away because the truth that I should have told you years ago finally came out. Well damn it Deacon, I didn't get to pick and choose when you were or were not good for me. I could never let you go, because you are my addiction too. And good or bad, our lives are so intertwined and intricately meshed together, that there is no walking away, even for a brief period of time. When I showed up at your door that night, I was in. I was all in. And so were you. Yes, this is huge. This was betrayal on my part, nothing less than betrayal. But we need to work through this together, so you can understand why. So you can understand what I went through with this thing. So that you can know, that as much as this has hurt you, it hurt me too. It hurt our daughter. And if you want US to be something down the road, to be together, to build a family together, then we need to start over, at square one, and figure this thing out. We need to do therapy, we need to talk, we need to yell, we need to fight, but we need to do it together. Because whether we may like it or not, we're in this together for one reason and one reason only: Maddie."

She took a deep breath as she finished. Still looking at Deacon, she could see him processing and internalizing every word she had said. He took a deep breath and just looked at her.

"Well?" she asked, fear dancing across her blue eyes.  
"Ray, I love you. I do. And I want us to be something. I want us to be together. I want us to build something. But if you love me, then you need to trust me on this. I need to sort some things out on my own first. That is the only way this is going to work. I'm not saying I won't be here every night. And I will make sure to start making time to see you when the girls are here. But I need space first."  
"Then why are you even here?" she asked, as tears formed in her eyes.  
"Jesus Ray, I'm here because I love you."  
"Hmmph, that makes no sense at all Deacon. You love me, so you're sleeping in that damn chair every night, but when I'm out of the hospital you want space?"  
"Yes Ray, because if I don't take space when you get out of here, these feelings of anger, of hurt, of pain, they are gonna turn into resentment and I can't, I won't have that. Because right now, deep down, there is this twinge of hatred, hatred for the fact that you kept this from me. And I need to forgive you before we can start working on this."

His last sentence stung her ears. A part of him hated her. Truly hated her for what she had kept from him. She didn't even have to look in his eyes to see in flaring up, it had completely soaked his words as they rolled off his tongue. She let out a quiet sob as she leaned into him again. How on Earth had everything become such a mess. He continued to hold her as she cried. Listening to her cry, feeling her chest heave against him made tears well up in his own eyes. He wasn't sure when they had both fallen asleep or how long they stayed like that, but he woke to the sound of a phone chiming.

Glancing at the end table, he noticed Rayna's phone lighting up. She was out cold. Glancing at the caller ID, it was Teddy. Deacon groaned, he was ready to place it back on the table, but thought better. He knew there was probably a reason for the call. Untangling himself from her grip, he exited the room and answered the phone.

"Hello, Rayna's phone," he stated calmly.  
"Deacon? What, um, uh, where is Rayna?"  
"She is resting. I, um, I'm sorry for picking up her phone, I just figured it might be important."  
"Well it is, listen. I'm supposed to have the girls tonight, but I have had a bunch of stuff come up. I'm going to be working through the night. I was going to have Rayna get ahold of Tandy."  
"Look, I, could watch the girls. Your place or wherever. Just sit with them until you get home."  
"I don't think that is a good idea Deacon."  
"Listen, Teddy. I get it okay? You know what I was like back then, you saw what I did to Rayna. And that day outside the mayor's office, you made it pretty clear how you've always felt about me. But truth is, I got sober, and I stayed sober for over 13 years. Yes, I didn't take that bombshell so well. But put yourself in my shoes for just a minute. You get news that shatters your world, how would you react?" he paused, collecting his thoughts again, "anyway, I've always been uncle Deacon. I love those girls. And yes, Maddie knows the truth, but I would never try and take your place in anyway. What I would like, is to spend some time with them. I think tonight could be a good way to start."  
"Huh, I didn't know you could talk so much. I guess, uh, that would be okay. Be here by 7."  
"Thanks, I appreciate it," Deacon got out before he heard the dial tone.

A smile played across Deacon's lips as he went back into the room. It was 6:15 and he had to get going. He reached Rayna's bed and leaned in, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"I love you darlin. We're gonna get through this I promise," he whispered. And with that he headed out the door.

As Deacon pulled up at Teddy's townhome, he let out a long sigh. He walked up the path and knocked. Maddie answered the door.

"Hi," she said shyly.  
"Hey darlin, how are you?"  
"Good, um," she paused, internalizing something, with the same expression he wore when thinking deeply. Suddenly, she lunged forward, wrapping her arms around his waist as she burried her face in his chest, hugging him tightly. He wrapped his arms around her, returning the hug. When she pulled away, she looked up at him, "everything is gonna be okay right?"  
"Of course," he smiled, as she turned and led him into the living room.

Teddy was just helping Daphne finish her homework when he glanced up.

"Hey Deacon, thanks again. Listen, both girls have a little homework to finish. Then you guys can hang out until 9. That's bedtime," he turned to the girls, "no arguing with Deacon about that girls."  
"Okay," they both grumbled.  
"Alright 9, got it," Deacon smiled. Teddy nodded and made his exit.

The next two hours were amazing. Deacon couldn't believe it. He and the girls had finished the homework. Deacon hadn't remembered elementary math being that hard. But then they had played music. And it was magical. At 9, both of the girls hugged him and made their way upstairs to bed. Deacon plopped himself down on the couch and flipped through a magazine.

At 11:30, Teddy came through the front door. Deacon could tell he was frazzled about something, but knew it wasn't his place to ask. He quickly stood and pulled his boots on.

"Thanks for this Teddy, means a lot," he said, unable to make eye contact with Teddy.  
"Uh, yeah," Teddy managed, distracted by the phone in his hand.

As Deacon headed out the door, he paused, overhearing Teddy on the phone. All he heard was "Peggy, we will figure this all out I promise," and that was enough. He didn't want any more drama than his current state of affairs. He pulled the door closed, climbed in his truck and headed back to the hospital.

When he walked into the room, Rayna was setting up, flipping through a magazine.

"Hey," she smiled, "wondered where you were."  
"I actually spent the evening with the girls," he couldn't contain his smile.  
"Really? How?" she was more than curious.  
"Teddy called your phone earlier, I figured it could be important so I answered. Well, he was gonna have you ask Tandy to watch 'em while he worked late. But I offered, and he reluctantly agreed."  
"Aw, babe. That's great. I am so happy for you," she smiled, extending a hand to him. He gladly reached out and took her slender fingers and intertwined them with his own. After looking at their hands a moment, she scooted over and nodded for him to climb in. She spoke when she noticed his hesitation.

"No strings, just figured you could use a decent night sleep. After all, I've got a couple more days in this damn bed."  
"Yeah, well, punctured lungs, shattered ribs, severely damaged kidneys, usually makes for a long hospital stay."  
"True," she smiled. She was enjoying the lightheartedness and joking in their conversation. She hadn't seen him smile like this is the last two weeks. And she had missed it.  
"What?" he asked when he noticed her staring.  
"I've missed seein you smile is all," she said softly as she traced a finger across his jaw line. Her finger lingered for just a moment, then retreated to the pages of the magazine. They both took in the silence before Deacon stood. Rayna looked at him questioningly for a moment, before smiling as he shed his jacket, button-down, and boots. He then peeled back the blanket and crawled in beside her.

Rayna tossed the magazine on the table and switched off the light before snuggling into the covers. Deacon layed on his side, Rayna's body pressed against him. She was laying flat on her back and each time she moved her head, her hair brushed his face. The tantalizing scent of her amber waves still drove him crazy after all these years. And the way the moon shined through the blinds, gave way to the very thin material of the hospital gown. And apparently, the room was a bit chilly. Deacon shook his head, telling himself to pull it together. Apparently the internal battle he was having was causing him to squirm, because suddenly, Rayna's voice filled his ears.

"Deacon, wanna stop squirming? You can move the chair if you aren't comfortable."  
"That's not it Ray, I'm more than comfortable..it's just, well, are you cold? Because your upper body is very telling," he sighed, as he rolled halfway to his back, brushing his hand across his chin in contemplation of his sheer honesty.  
"You are shameless Deacon," she chuckled, "but yes I am a bit chilly. This gown is made of next to nothin."  
"Come on Ray, you're killin me here," he rolled back to his side, propping himself up on his elbow to look down at her. She smiled as she met his gaze. The look in her blue eyes mirrored his own. But she quickly looked away.

"What?" he asked.  
"Oh, it's nothing. Nevermind," she glanced up at him once more, "forget about it."  
"Ray," he said sternly, to tone he reserved for use when she was annoying him and he needed to make that known.  
"Well, I'm, uh, I'm horny. And I can't do a damn thing about it."  
"Why is that?" he asked with a chuckle as he raised an eyebrow at her.  
"Because you are laying here next to me which doesn't help. And even if I wanted to, with these ribs and stitches, I can't reach that area to take care of business."

He let out another laugh.

"It is not funny Deacon. You are a man, it's easy for you."  
"Darlin, it is not easy for me. Because I don't even do what you are talkin about. And laying here next to you, I'm in the same frame of mind."  
His gaze met hers once more. And again, their lust filled blue eyes matched. They both saw and they both knew they should look away. They had decided that space was the best thing for the time being. But neither could look away. And before Deacon knew what he was doing, his lips were on Rayna's. Very quickly, their tongues met. As his tongue swirled around her mouth, she brought her hands up to cup his face, before they found their home tangled in his soft black hair. Deacon's hand started by cupping her cheek and tracing her jawline before it slowly skated down her neck. Once again he began massaging her breasts through the thin fabric. But his hands were becoming impatient, he wanted to touch her bare skin. Quickly, he found the ties at her side and pulled them loose. He gave the front half of the gown a gentle pull as she slid her arm out. Pulling it away from her body, Deacon gasped as the moonlight hit her naked body. A mix of emotions hit him. She was so beautiful, but a twinge of pain crept in as he took in the bruises and stitches that were before his eyes. But that pain was quickly clouded as his hand went back to its former location. Teasing her breasts as he placed kisses across her neck and chest. His hand slowly skated down her stomach as his mouth took over the teasing of her breasts. But his eyes stayed trained on his hand, careful not to bump her injuries.

His fingers danced across what would be her underwear line. He smiled against the skin of chest as her hands tangled in his hair and a slight whimper escaped her lips. His hand began teasing her inner thighs, lightly brushing across her there.

"Wait, Deacon, you don't have to do this," she sighed, "I know you want space."  
"Yes, when you are outta here. But right now, I want to do this. I need this Ray. We need this. To be lost in each other for a while."

With that his hand made contact. His fingers sliding up and down the dampness between her thighs. He brought his lips back to hers and kissed her deeply as his fingers dipped inside and began stroking her. He moved slowly at first, but as her hips started meeting his hand, he picked up the pace. As he did this, he added in his thumb to pay keen attention to her most sensitive spot. The combination of the two was driving her wild. He was relentless with his hand there and his mouth on her skin. Suddenly he began adjusting the angle of his hand and that was all it took to send her over the edge. He felt her muscles tighten and her body go rigid. Once more he drew her lips in for another kiss.

When she relaxed, he brought his fingers up to his mouth and licked them one by one. Watching him do that was incredibly erotic and only turned her on more. He smiled down at her before placing the gown back over her.

"Wait, what about you?" she asked, with a look of concern.  
"Me?" he cocked an eyebrow at her, "what about me?"  
"Well, you can't not get something outta the deal," she smiled, reaching between his legs to cup him through his jeans, "after all, you are ready to go."  
"Ray, I'm fine. I've got two hands if I need some release," he smiled down at her.  
"Not what I was meaning, Deacon, if you can be gentle, I think we could.."  
"Are you crazy Ray? We cannot have sex when you can't even set up without wincing in pain."  
"Deacon, if I could handle what just happened, I can handle you. As long as you are careful."  
"Ray, I can't chance hurting you."  
"Deacon," she was giving him the stern look now, as she undid his belt buckle, "let's try, please?" she asked, as her hand slipped beneath the waistband of his boxers. She grasped him and began sliding her hand up and down his length.  
"Ray," he sighed, "oh god," as he let out a shaky breath. He closed his eyes, enjoying her work. She picked up the pace as he began moving his hips to match her hand. After a few minutes, he was too close for comfort. Gently he squeezed her wrist, letting her know she could stop.  
"I'm only stopping if you say yes," she whispered against his neck.  
"Oh Ray," he grumbled, before standing up to shed his jeans. He just about shed his boxers, when he quickly made his way to the door, flipping the lock.

Back at the bedside, he stripped out of his boxers and tossed his shirt aside before straddling her waist. He knew that this would allow him to keep her from moving to meet his hips. It would also be a tighter fit, allowing him to let go sooner.

"Before I do this Ray, you cannot go crazy trying to match my pace. You will hurt yourself."  
"Fine," she smiled, nodding.

He spread her legs between his just enough to enter her. He also kept his weight in his arms, so he didn't put any pressure on her ribs. She felt so good. He truly had missed this, her, them. After a few moments, he finally began to move. His pace was very slow and drawn out at first, but he had been right about this position for himself, and apparently for Rayna too. Both of their breaths were coming quicker as he picked up his pace. He was so close when Rayna opened her eyes and met his gaze. He could see the glimmer in her eyes, the same one he knew he had. Despite everything, this was never their issue. This, always seemed to work out some of their problems, even if only for a little while. Just a few more strokes and he came, and as he continued to move, riding out the climax, Rayna followed suit, calling out his name.

He quickly rolled off to the side of her. After a few minutes, he opened his eyes to look at her.

"You okay darlin?"  
"I'm more than okay," she smiled, "but this has never been our issue. We've always been really good at this. And lets be honest, we're each others weakness."  
"That we are darlin, that we are."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Thank you all so much for the kind reviews :) I am so happy y'all are enjoying it. I use the song "If I Needed You" by Emmylou Harris and Don Williams. Enjoy!

2 weeks later:

Today was finally the day. She was being released from the hospital. But it had also been two weeks since she had seen Deacon. After they had made love that night, he held her close through the night, but made a quiet escape in the early house of the morning. It seemed the idea of agreement between them about being the others weakness had scared him.

She continued to look at her phone hoping to see a text message from him. But there was nothing, not even from the girls. The girls she thought, she couldn't wait to be home. Finally back with them. She was surprised at how well they were handling this, particularly how well Maddie was handling everything. The girls were very excited to spend time with Deacon and that made Rayna happy. Hopefully soon, Deacon would be ready to spend time with her too. She looked at her phone again: 10:15. It was so close, she would be discharged in 15 minutes. Tandy and the girls were picking her up. Tandy informed her that the girls had a surprise waiting at home. And she imagined that meant they had baked her a cake.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she heard a knock on her door. She sat up, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed as she looked over, surprised to see Deacon in the doorway. After a few minutes of pondering something, he marched straight over to the bed, grabbed her hands and pulled her to stand. Her body was flush against his and he simply looked at her, before leaning in to kiss her. There was no hesitation in this kiss, it was deliberate, and filled with passion. His hands grasped her butt, pulling her hips against his own as her hands traced across the planes of his shoulders. Finally after several minutes like this, they broke apart for air, Rayna resting her forehead against his.

"Wanna tell me what that was?" she asked.  
"What do you mean? That was quite an exceptional hello kiss, if I do say so myself."  
"I agree Deacon, but I haven't seen or heard from you in two weeks, last talk we had was the one where you told me you would need space. Now you show up here kissing me like that," she had pulled back and was looking at him squarely.  
"Ray. I have been thinking. And honestly, two weeks without you damn near killed me. But it also gave me time to process this. Us. Everything. And truth is, as much as it hurts me that you lied, being without you, being without the girls, that hurts even more. I am not sayin I am okay with the fact that you lied to me. But I almost lost you, it would be foolish not to forgive you and try and make this work. But, we are gonna have to take this slow, one day at a time. Which means, no sex, for a while."  
"Oh Deacon, I am so happy to hear you say that. Everything except the last part. You really think that will work?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow at him.  
"We gotta try it. We need to be back to square one, starting over Ray."  
"Alright, when does this starting over thing begin?"  
"Soon as we leave here and get you home."  
"Oh, so Tandy isn't picking me up?"  
"Nope, I'm takin ya home. Girls called, said the surprise wasn't ready, so they asked if I could get ya and keep ya distracted for another hour or so."  
"Well, I have an idea, if you have your guitar with ya?"  
"Course I do."  
"Alright, let me get changed and we will get out of here."

They made their way to Deacon's vehicle. His replacement was a nice, fairly new Tahoe. Rayna was surprised. Deacon had never been one to care about his vehicle. He could see the questions on her face as she took in this one. Pulling open her door for her he finally spoke.

"It's safe, and all that, ya know, for kids riding in the back seat," he blushed slightly as he looked at his boots.  
"Deacon, when did you get this?"  
"This morning. I had a rental for the last few weeks. But today was the day I decided we were gonna do this thing together. So I got this, thinkin bout all of us."

She smiled as she quickly leaned up to kiss him before climbing in. Once in the drivers seat, Deacon started the engine before turning to look at her.

"Where to princess?"  
"Our spot," she smiled.

They parked on the bridge and Deacon pulled his guitar from the back seat, along with a blanket. He hopped the wall first, setting everything down, before helping Rayna down. They layed out the blanket under the big oak tree near the waters edge. A lot of the shrubs and bushes had grown up since the last time they were here. The spot they had chosen was out of view from the road. They got comfortable and Deacon pulled his guitar from its case. It wasn't his usual Gibson. It was a Martin and from the looks of it, fairly new.

"The J-45 got smashed in the accident. Picked this one up the other day from Gruhn," he stated, noticing the questioning look in her eyes.  
"Is that a D-28 reissue?" she asked.  
"It is indeed, still know your guitars huh?"  
"Of course, you taught me well. But I am sorry about the Gibson, I know how much that guitar meant to you."

Rayna thought back to when he got that guitar. It was his first big purchase after their demo had been picked up by Edgehill. He found it in this hole in the wall guitar shop in Dallas. It was a 1942 J-45 legend and it had cost him nearly $8,000. Once he got it, he wouldn't put it down. When they had gotten back to their hotel room that night, he had practically ignored her. Refusing to look away from that guitar. When Rayna had had enough of this, she had stripped down to nothing and sprawled across the bed. When calling his name a few times hadn't worked, she hurled a pillow and hit him squarely in the head. It had startled him and he had nearly dropped the guitar. Glancing over at her, annoyance and a glimmer of anger had shone in his eyes. Then he had focused, and processed her, naked laying back in a very seductive fashion. He blinked twice, then stood promptly placing the guitar carefully in its case, before kicking off his boots and shedding his shirt. At the foot of the bed, he removed his wrangler's. Still silent, he kissed his way up her body, stopping short of her lips. He held himself above her and met her gaze. This exchange had been his silent apology, that and all the naughty things that followed.

Rayna laughed out loud and was brought back to reality. Deacon grinned at her, knowing full well what she was thinking about.

"Thinkin back to when I got that guitar huh?"  
"Bout the fact that I had to get completely naked before you would pay attention to me? Yes I was," she smiled.  
"Yeah, but hey, I made it up to you. Several times to the best of my recollection."  
"That's right, you did," she paused, "so I was thinkin we could do our old song."  
"Got alotta those Ray, which one?"

She hesitated as she looked at him. She knew this suggestion would pull down all of his defenses.

"If I Needed You?"  
"Yeah," he sighed, "I think we can do that."

Without another word, he started playing the chords. Both their voices melted together for the opening chorus, both in a heated stare.

_If I needed you  
Would you come to me  
Would you come to me  
For to ease my pain  
If you needed me  
I would come to you  
I would swim the seas  
For to ease your pain _

Deacon couldn't take his eyes from her. Drawing a deep breath, Rayna began the first verse as the beautiful sounds rang out from Deacon's guitar.

_Well the night's forlorn  
And the morning's born  
And the morning shines  
With the lights of love  
And you'll miss sunrise  
If you close your eyes  
And that would break  
My heart in two _

The look of love and need in Rayna's eyes as she sang those final words nearly crushed Deacon as he continued to play. Drawing a breath of his own he followed her back into the chorus.

_If I needed you  
Would you come to me  
Would you come to me  
For to ease my pain  
If you needed me  
I would come to you  
I would swim the seas  
For to ease your pain_

Rayna couldn't take it anymore, the tension building between them as they sang, she had to look away. Breaking the eye contact she looked out to the water as Deacon's voice filled the silence with the second verse.

_Baby's with me now  
Since I showed her how  
To lay  
Her lilly  
Hand in mine  
Who would ill agree  
She's a sight to see  
A treasure for  
The poor to find_

His deep voice sent chills down her spine as she drew another breath to join him for the final chorus. Making eye contact with him once more, they joined together.  
_If I needed you  
Would you come to me  
Would you come to me  
For to ease my pain  
If you needed me  
I would come to you  
I would swim the seas  
For to ease your pain_

Deacon strummed the final chords, his blue eyes still fixed on Rayna. As the final strum rang out, they both continued looking at the other. Finally Rayna spoke, glancing back out at the water.

"Such a pretty song. Still one of my favorites."  
"Ray," Deacon barely breathed out as he set his guitar off to the side. But she still didn't look at him. He scooted up next to her, taking his hand in hers. This touch made her look at him.  
"What's the matter Ray?"  
"Come on Deacon, you know exactly what is wrong. We can't even sing a song without it turning into a heated, sexual tension filled moment. And we've only been under the guise of this no-sex rule for 35 minutes. Call me selfish, but we went 14 years without each other, we had it back for 3 weeks, and its taken away again. I don't think my body can handle it. I guess we're gonna have to have a no music, no guitar talk, and no cooking in the kitchen rule as well, because lets face it, just about everything that we can do together, we've made about sex at least once in our time together," she sighed finally looking at him again.  
"First of all Ray, that rule doesn't start until we get you home. Second of all, we're grown adults, we can handle this. Third, yeah you are right, we're gonna have a lot of other rules," he grinned.

She smiled back at him and the air between them quickly changed. Both watched lust fill the blue eyes staring back at them. After another moment, Rayna pressed her lips to Deacon's as his hands cupped her face. Their tongues quickly met as Deacon laid them down, holding himself above Rayna, keeping his weight off her. After a few minutes like this Deacon broke the kiss.

"So, what do you think will be the least painful for you, ya know, position wise?" he asked grinning his most seductive grin, as his hand toyed with the hem of her t-shirt.  
"I'm thinkin, this," she smiled, pushing him up as she rolled over and climbed to her hands and knees. She glanced over her shoulder at Deacon, who was on his knees, sitting back on his heels, grinning at her.  
"Tell me how you want this Ray, slow an easy? Or quick and hard?"

Her only response was to lightly graze her ass across his pelvis, before pushing up onto her knees, and resting against his chest as she reached between them and grasped him through his jeans, giving him a slight squeeze. After planting a kiss on his chin, she resumed her position. Deacon quickly undid his belt and jeans, pushing them off his waist. After he positioned himself behind Rayna, he pulled down the sweats and cotton panties she was wearing. Grabbing her waist, he pulled her flush against him, moving his hips slightly, he slowly teased her. When Rayna impatiently bucked her hips against him, he pulled back, tracing his fingers up her inner thigh before dipping them into the dampness between her thighs. Again Rayna grew impatient.

He leaned over her body, his chest firmly against her back as he whispered in her ear, "easy Ray, I was just makin sure you are ready," before nibbling her ear.  
"Deacon, I've been wet and ready since you kissed me an hour ago."

Smiling, Deacon reclaimed his grip on her waist. Without any warning, Deacon slammed into Rayna, eliciting a whimper from her. He filled her completely, and the delightful feeling of him nearly made her lose it right there. She couldn't believe they had gone two weeks without this. Without warning he removed himself almost completely, and then slammed back into her depths. Rayna could not help the sounds that were escaping her lips. Deacon began adding a swivel of his hips with each thrust, as he intensified the pace. As he did so, Rayna began moving her body to match his thrusts. This friction began causing equally delightful moans and groans to erupt from Deacon's throat. He picked up the pace once more, and again, Rayna matched him. They were both getting close and Deacon reached between Rayna's thighs, stroking her sensitive spot as he continued to move within her. The combination pushed Rayna over the edge and she came, calling out his name. After a few more thrusts, Deacon joined her climax. After their breathing leveled, Deacon removed himself from her, pulled Rayna's panties and sweats back up around her waist, did the same for himself and flopped to his back on the blanket. Rayna followed suit, sprawling out beside him.

"See what I mean, this may well kill us," she said with a laugh.  
"Ray, I guess we just have to outline what we define as sex then don't we?" he asked, propping himself up on his side.  
"Deacon you can't be serious? What, are we going to set a limitation that its just hand jobs and such until this no sex thing subsides?"  
"Why not? You know you like my fingers Ray," he grinned at her, that look of lust returning just as quickly as it had disappeared.  
"Deacon, that is ridiculous. No sex means no sex. Your hands will be getting nowhere near my lady parts. And my hands are not touching you there," she pointed at the bulge that was beginning to grow again after all this dirty talk.  
"And see, we're just talkin and you are already gettin hard all over again."  
"Can't help it Ray, the way you are getting all hot and bothered by this situation is turning me on," he grinned scooting his body against her. She grinned up at him as he leaned in for a kiss. He quickly deepened it, and just as things were starting to escalate, Rayna broke the kiss. Reaching between them, she grasped him through his jeans, and began gently moving her hand. Just as quick as she got him worked up she stopped.

"Well, we better get going," she smiled, the most devious grin he had ever seen.  
"That's just cruel Ray."  
"Rules are rules," she smiled, before placing a final kiss on his lips.

They climbed back into his truck and headed for her house. Halfway through the drive, Rayna reached over and took his hand. Surprised, he welcomed the touch and smiled at her. Rayna's thoughts were flooded with so many emotions. She was out of the hospital now. They were starting over with a clean slate. This made her happy, but also nervous. What if, even with a clean slate, they couldn't make it work. After a few minutes of contemplating how she wanted to say it, Rayna finally spoke.

"I love you babe. And I know that I hurt you terribly, and I know it is gonna take a long time for that trust to come back. But I also know that you took that you've taken the last month to sort out some of your emotions and forgive me. And I am so happy that you did. And I understand that the ball is in your court on this thing. It's gonna be tough, we're gonna have to work at this every day. But..." she trailed off as she looked out the window.  
"But what Ray?"  
"Well, what if starting over, clean slate and all, and you still can't forgive me completely, or you get second thoughts about this? Because Deacon, I am in and I am all in. But I can't bare the thought of some sort of bump in the road derailing things and having you walk away. I guess what I am sayin, is, at this point, there is no walkin away. No more space. We're in this and we're in this together."  
"Ray, I know that. I am in this for the long haul too. I don't want anymore space. 14 years and some change was quite enough space. I mean honestly Ray, after everything we've been through, there isn't another bump that could make me walk away."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Thank you all for the wonderful reviews :) please keep giving me thoughts and responses! They are greatly appreciated.

Belle Meade

Rayna and Deacon rode silently the rest of the drive. They pulled up to the house and made their way inside. They heard giggles echoing from the kitchen. Rayna took Deacon's hand as they rounded the corner.

Rayna let out a laugh when she took in the sight before their eyes. There was a giant cake in the middle of the counter. Balloons peppered the ceiling. Streamers were going in every single direction. And a giant "Welcome Home" banner was draped across the doorway. Maddie, Daphne, and Tandy stood proudly at the island.

"Momma, do you like it?" Daphne asked.

"Girls, I love it. It's wonderful," she smiled as she closed the distance between them.

The girls carefully sized her up, watching her every movement, unsure whether hugging her would hurt her or not.

"Well, y'all gonna hug me or not?"

With that both girls sprung into her arms, clinging as tight as possible to her. Very quickly, tears were flowing from both girls eyes. Deacon had given them their space as he perched against the other side of the counter, smiling from ear to ear at this reunion. She is finally home and finally okay, he thought to himself. He hadn't noticed Tandy walk over and lean next to him.

"Thank you for bringing her home," she paused, "and you two, you're gonna be okay right?"

"You're welcome," he paused, "and yeah, we're gonna be more than okay."

The next several hours flew by as they all cooked dinner, ate cake, and relaxed in the living room. The girls caught Rayna up on all that she had missed in the world of celebrity gossip. They also showed her the new song they had started learning with the help of Deacon. Tandy filled her in on the happenings with her father as well. After all the catching up, Rayna and Deacon tucked the girls into bed. But sadly, there were still repercussions of the accident that Tandy needed to discuss with her.

"Actually, sweetie, there are a few things I need to chat with you and Deacon about."

"Okay what is it?" She asked glancing at Deacon, who took a seat beside her.

"Well, Buck will be calling tomorrow to confirm all this. But we need to release a statement. Now the driver of the other car was fine. So there is no issue there. But people want to know, what you two were doing together, why Deacon was drinking, and how you lost control of the vehicle."

"Well, I think the simplest answer to all of that is, I was giving him a ride home. I didn't see the car. That's as simple as it gets. And as for Deacon's drinking," she paused turning to look at him, "how do you want to address that babe?"

Deacon studied her for a moment. He knew she wasn't trying to sound insensitive to the situation. It's not like they could go on live television explaining the real reason. He took a deep breath.

"Well, I think that's a fine answer. But I don't think they will buy a basic relapse after 13 years, so go ahead and tell them I got some tough news about some family. But everyone is okay and that's all I would like to say about it."

"That's great babe," she smiled, taking his hand.

"Great," Tandy paused, "well, I'm going to get going. I'm having a late dinner with Bucky. I will pass this all along. Deacon, you can help her with her bath yes?"

Deacon looked from Tandy to Rayna, who was now looking at the floor.

"Bath?" Deacon asked.

"Yeah, she isn't supposed to bathe on her own yet and she will need help changing the dressing on her stitches," she paused looking at Rayna, "let me guess, she didn't tell you?"

"No she didn't tell me," Deacon responded looking between the two women, who were in a heated stare.

"Rayna are you crazy? You told me you had discussed this with Deacon and that you wouldn't need my help."

"Oh Tandy give it a rest. Somebody," she nodded to Deacon, "created a no sex rule. I didn't think him bathing me and such, would make that very easy. Figure I'd just handle it on my own."

"You've gotta be kidding me. Listen, you two put your horny teenage hormones on hold. This is is serious stuff," she said sternly, looking at Deacon now.

"Yes ma'am," he smiled, smirking as Tandy shook her head.

"Alright, bye y'all," she paused, "and Deacon, make sure she gets to bed, to rest!"

As soon as Tandy was gone Deacon rounded the counter, pulling Rayna into his arms.

"So were you plannin on keepin this whole bath thing a secret?"

"Yes," she blushed, looking away from his gaze.

"Why would you go and do a thing like that?" he asked, cupping her face, tipping it towards him to meet her gaze.

"Because, I don't need nor do I want you to see me like this. Besides, I doubt you will be able to keep your hands to yourself. And as we established, rules are rules."

Seeing her blush and get all worked up had only made Deacon more antsy. As she was speaking and the crimson was taking over her cheeks, his hands had begun caressing her ass, gently grazing up and down it. Turning them slightly, he leaned his back against the counter, giving her ass a squeeze, he pulled her waist against his own. Still focused intently on her, holding her in place, he swiveled his hips slightly, pressing himself against her. Just as quickly he broke their eye contact as he began kissing her neck. After a few moments, Rayna let out a heavy sigh.

"Deacon," she gasped as the stiffness in his jeans was becoming nearly unbearable again her, "this is not helping the situation." She let out another sigh as she pulled away from his grasp, "Now, come on. I'm going to take a bath. You can wait outside the door and if I need anything, I will ask you."

"Rayna, you can't be serious. You're gonna make me sit outside the door?"

"Yes. I want to honor our '_back to square one' _agreement," she stated mockingly as they made their way upstairs. Deacon took a seat in front of the vanity outside of the bathroom door. Rayna left it open just a crack. He heard the water begin to run, filling the bath. But when he caught movement in the mirror he glanced up. He caught sight of her naked body dipping her toes into the tub, checking the temperature. His breath hitched in his throat. God she was beautiful. And he hadn't seen her naked in actual light since the night she had shown up at his door, declaring her love for him. After the CMA nomination party, they had made love in the limo and then again on the entryway floor of his house. She must have felt his gaze because she met his stare in the mirror. Quickly he glanced down. Then he heard the door open. Turning he saw her walking back towards the tub, waving a hand at him. He scrambled to his feet following her into the room.

"You can sit on the edge, but keep your hands to yourself until I need help with my back. Apparently, twisting and turning is where I can run into trouble with these stitches," she said, finally making eye contact with him as she smiled. She was still standing naked in front of him, dipping her toes in the water.

"So, earlier, didn't hurt you or anything?" He asked, blushing slightly as he looked back down at his feet. He kept staring at them as he drew imaginary pictures on the granite floor with his toes.

"Nope. Only pleasure babe," she said with a laugh. "You can look at me ya know?"

"No, I can't. Because when I look at you, it only makes me realize how dumb this idea was. But if I don't look at you, I will have half a chance of keepin my hands ta myself and honorin this agreement we made."

"Deacon," her voice had gone from playful to very serious and he couldn't help but look up, "first of all, this was your idea, which I informed you, was a very bad one. Second of all, I am doing my best to honor it, and I admit, it's a chivalrous notion. This whole: lets start over, get to know each other again, albeit, it's a very misguided one. Because, let's face it babe. There are three things that I've done since we met, and continue to do very well," and with that she stopped, just waiting from him to ask. So naturally, after letting out a shaky breath due to the sheer intensity of her stare, he asked.

"What's that Ray?"

"Well for one, there is Maddie. I'd say she is probably the best thing I've done. There is music, which I have done a pretty exceptional job at over the past 20 years, both of which wouldn't be possible without you," she paused again, blushing slightly as she broke their eye contact.

"I agree completely with both of those Ray. Maddie, without a doubt. And music, not much else you do better darlin, but are ya gonna let me in on number three?" he asked coyly, now kneeling on the floor, leaning on the edge of the tub, his gaze focused on her as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

"Well babe," she paused, scooting to the edge of the tub, her face inches, "you. And I don't just mean the raw desire of a quick fuck. With you it's more. Always has been. It's all of that desire and hunger, an all of the slow, passion-filled sex that defines makin love, all rolled into one. That's us. Strip everything else away, we do that really, really well. Because bein together for music, and bein together physically is what makes us, us. I mean think about it, the last 14 years, we barely walked that line. We lived on those memories, they got us through it. And I say that with no disrespect towards my marriage, I loved Teddy, but it was never the same. See you an I Deacon Claybourne, we are connected, heart an soul. Musically, physically, an everythin in between."

"I can't agree more Ray. You do me, very very well," he said with a smirk, "and I agree with all of that. We are connected. Heart n soul, but what exactly does that have to do with this lil ole agreement we made?" He grinned from ear to ear, knowing exactly what she was going to say, but he wanted to get her flustered giving her explanation.

"Oh Deacon, you know exactly what I'm gettin at," she huffed, watching him grin at her, "damn it Deacon. It means, this no-sex rule is ridiculous. You know it, I know. Because us without sex, now that we've had it back, is like us without music. It's never gonna happen, because it's part of us, part of our connection. After all, it's what all those damn songs get written about."

"Well, alright Ray, you don't gotta be so forceful bout it. All ya gotta do is ask nicely."

With that, Deacon stood. He met Rayna's gaze and held it as he slowly undid each button of his shirt. Once he pushed it off his shoulders, he undid his belt, unzipped his jeans and slid them down his legs. After stepping out of them, he slowly pushed his boxers off his hips, past his thighs and let them fall. Once he stepped out of them, Rayna's eyes left his and trailed down his body. God he was a sight. The patch of hair in the middle of his chest, the thin line of hair that circled his belly button and led her south, one she had memorized with her tongue. Then his manhood, in all of its glory. She smiled at the realization, that was the first and last member she would see in her life. She continued taking in his body, including the wonderful thighs that she could all too often clench, encouraging him on. When she couldn't stand the distance any longer she held her hand out towards him.

He locked his fingers with hers and stepped onto the steps.

"Scoot forward," he instructed quietly. She did as he asked and he settled in behind her, wrapping his arms and legs around her, pulling her flush against him. She felt him, all of him, against her. They sat like that, in silence for quite a while. Then he began washing her body. He started with her auburn waves, massaging her scalp. He slowly worked his way down her body. While every touch elicited sparks in Rayna's body, there was only love and nurturing in his every move. This made her want him even more. The fact that they could be this close, him touching every part of her body, and this naked, and they were still in this tub, they both had some sort of faint will power.

When he finally finished he instructed her to stand. She did and he followed suit, wrapping a towel around his waist, before stepping out of the tub. Rayna reached for a towel of her own, but his voice stopped her.

"Stay there, and stay still."

"Deacon, I'm cold now. Why can't I get a towel?"

"Because," he stated, returning with gauze, "I'm gonna dry you off, I'm gonna change your bandages, and then I'm gonna make love to you."

She opened her mouth to speak, but he silenced her with a kiss, before taking her hand and helping her out of the tub. Then he proceeded to towel her dry. Starting at her feet, he worked his way up each leg, once he reached her mid-thigh he stood, and wrapped the towel around her hair, twirling it to rest on top of her head. Taking his own towel from his waist, he resumed his drying. When he reached the concave of her thighs, he let his fingers glide across her, feeling the dampness. He smirked.

"Don't imagine a towel is gonna do much for that."

"Deacon."

"Ray," he grinned, his fingers still gliding across her as he patted her dry with the towel in his other hand, "I gotta dry ya off before I can change the bandages."

He gently slid the towel up her stomach, stopping at her chest to provide a little massaging action. Her eyelids fluttered at the feeling of the plush terry cloth against her breasts. Finally, he dropped the towel and began working on her bandages. Five minutes later, all four bandages were changed. Deacon discarded the trash and turned around to see Rayna, still without a towel, leaning against the counter. Her wet hair was free from the confines of the towel, falling clumsily around her face.

"Shall we head to bed darlin?" he asked with a grin.

"Nope."

"Whadya mean, nope?" he looked at her curiously.

Then she turned around, bracing herself against the counter as she looked at him in the mirror.

"Right here, right now, I want you."

"Ray, I don't know. We need to be careful. Quick and dirty is not exactly careful."

She cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Who said anything about quick and dirty? Just because I'm standin at the sink doesn't mean I don't want slow an passionate Mr. Claybourne."

He didn't say another word. He came up behind her, running his hands up the back of her thighs, across her ass, up her back, down her arms, before covering her own hands on the counter. Then he kissed a trail across her shoulder blades and then down her spine. Drawing his hands back up her arms, he reached around the front of her, giving her breasts a gentle squeeze before tracing them down her stomach, dipping two fingers inside of her. As his fingers worked in and out of her, he gently nibbled across both of her shoulders, along her neck, and finally swirled his tongue around her ears. Gently, his hands settle on her hips, he is almost ready to enter her when they hear a cry coming from down the hallway.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6  
Thank you for the reviews! They mean a lot! Please continue sharing your thoughts. In this chapter I use the song It's Your Love, by Tim and Faith! Thanks again :)

Deacon released her hips, straightening up as he looked at her in the mirror. Rayna stood, padding across the floor to grab her robe. As she slipped it on and tied it, she smiled at Deacon, a look of slight disappointment on his face.

"See, all this, comes with the territory babe," she paused grabbing a towel to hand it to him, "I will be back in a few minutes," she smiled, placing a kiss on his cheek.

Rayna turned a lamp on in the bedroom before she exited. She heard a faint cry coming from Daphne's room. When she pushed open the door, her heart melted. Daphne was sitting up clenching her teddy bear, the one Rayna got her when she was in the hospital with appendicitis.

"Daphne sweetie, what is it?" She asks, turning on the bedside lamb as she sits down.  
"I had an awful dream momma, that you were still in the hospital, that you wouldn't wake up."  
"Sweetie, I'm here and I'm okay. We're a family again," she scoots up beside her daughter, pulling her close, hugging her tightly.  
Daphne cries quietly into chest for a few minutes until the sobs dwindle into nothing. Rayna looks down and sees that she is fast asleep. Gently she lays her back down and presses a kiss to her forehead.  
"I love you sweetie, sweet dreams."  
She turned out the light and headed to the door. She was almost out when Daphne faintly spoke again.  
"Love you too momma, and I'm glad Deacon gets to be a part of the family."

Rayna smiles to herself as she pulls the door shut. Quietly, she makes her way down the hall to her bedroom. Shutting the door, she turns the lock, and turns around to find Deacon already in bed. He in on his side, with his back toward the door. She can't tell if he is sleeping, so she unties her robes and lets it fall off her shoulders as she crosses the room to the bed. Crawling in beside him, she switches the lamp off as she does. Snuggling up to his back, a frown crosses her face as she realizes he is clothed, boxers and a t-shirt.

Wrapping her arms around him, he tenses slightly as she rests her head on his shoulder, glancing down at his face.  
"Babe, what's all this? I told you I'd be back in a few minutes?"

No response came from his lips. Annoyed she reached over him, clicking the lamp on on his side of the bed. Once it was on, she tugged on his body pulling him to his back. She propped her head up on her arm as she looked at him. He avoided her gaze, staring at the ceiling.  
"Deacon, come on. What is this?"  
"Damn it Ray. You act like the only thing I care about is the physical side of us," he paused searching for his words, " I know what I signed up for here. You don't have to remind me all the time. And in the bathroom, I wasn't upset because Daphne "interrupted" the sex we were about to have. I was upset because the girls don't know I'm here, so I couldn't handle that with you."

Rayna let out a shaky breath. How had he known it was Daphne crying? And wow, I really hurt his feelings, she thought to herself.  
"Babe, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to belittle your commitment to this, I really didn't. And, how did you know that it was Daphne that was crying?"  
"It's just like music Ray. Daphne has a higher pitch to her voice. I could hear it," he stated, still not looking at her.  
"Babe, that makes me so happy. And hey," she paused, "will you look at me?" She asked, reaching out to cup his cheek. He turned his head slightly, to look at her.  
"Yeah?"  
"I love you. And we will talk to the girls in the morning, about you being around more often."  
"Really?" He asked, a slight smile playing on his lips.  
"Yes. Babe, I love you. So much it almost hurts when you aren't around, every second of every day. I want you here, the girls want you here. So yes."  
"I love you too Ray. And I love the girls. And I'm really all in with this. An I'm ready for us to be a family of sorts."

As he finished his sentence, he reached out, slipping his arm around her waist. He pulled her flush against him as he gave her a simple kiss. It was in this moment he realized she was naked. Very quickly, a devious grin graced his lips.

"No pjs for ya Ray?" He smiled as his hand began sliding up and down her back.  
"No, see I was plannin on finishing what we started in the bathroom."  
Deacon said no more. He sat up, pulling his shirt off and tossing it to the floor. Just as quickly he slid his boxers off. He turned his face back to Rayna and pulled her to him once more.

His lips inched toward hers slowly, pausing slightly before brushing his against her own. When they met, Rayna's hand began traveling across Deacon's chest. As their tongues met and tangled, Rayna's hand inched farther and farther down his body, until her palm brushed across him. A moan rumbled from deep in his throat at the feather like touch she was providing.

As Rayna began moving her hand up and down along him, slightly turning her wrist as she reached his base, Deacon's hips found her rhythm. As her hand continued, Deacon's hand, which had been massaging and teasing her breasts, made its way to the dampness nestled between her thighs.

They were both enjoying the closeness and one another's handy work as their lips met for another kiss. As Deacon bit down on Rayna's bottom lip, she attempted to pull him on top of her so they could get down to business. But Deacon didn't budge. Breaking this kiss, and ceasing her hand movement, she looked at him.

"Babe, what'sa matter? Do you not wanna?"  
Deacon grinned at her, his fingers still moving in and out of her, "I do Ray, but I'm not on top, yer in charge tonight."

And with that, Deacon retreated his hand and rolled to his back, tucking his hands behind his head as he waited for her to reposition herself. Rayna grinned as she straddled his waist. Ever so gently and slowly, she lowered herself onto him. Deacon let out a deep moan at the sensation and his hands quickly found her breasts. He sat up closer and once again teased and nibbled at her chest as she began a slow up and down pace.

After several excruciating but glorious minutes like this, Rayna picked up the pace. Deacon began raising his hips to meet her, his hands sliding up and down her waist. As their hips continued to meet, with each up and down movement Rayna made, she picked up the pace just a little. As she got closer and closer to the edge, she moved up and down him faster. Rayna hadn't been able to break her eye contact with Deacon as they found their rhythm. Even as his mouth teased her breasts, his eyes were deadlocked with hers. The sexual tension that brewed between them only intensified the pleasure as their hips met. Deacon could not get over the intensity of their connection. Rayna above him, looking down, her hair falling around her shoulders with every thrust. And having her take charge was completely erotic.

Back in their younger days, each moment of passion was filled with new and crazy positions. But he knew Rayna's sex life with Teddy had been anything but crazy. So he had half expected her to say no. But they were both enjoying the benefits of this position. Deacon could tell by the fire in her eyes. And he was enjoying the pace she was setting. She felt so good around him. He continued to watch as her face changed slightly, knowing she was getting closer. When she was nearing her peak, Rayna leaned back, placing her hands on either side of Deacon's ankles, giving him deeper penetration and a new angle to explore. They both greatly appreciated this.

"Oh god Ray," Deacon moaned as he filled her. Wanting to make her topple over the edge, he stopped his movement, pulling out slightly.  
"Jesus, Deacon. Don't stop," she cried, pure ecstasy filling her voice.

He thrust his hips, filling her again, as she met him. Deacon reached between her thighs, stroking her most sensitive spot as he swiveled his hips. Rayna felt him explore all of her with that swivel of his hips. He did this once more as she met him, and the combination of this motion and his thumb on her, Rayna found her release.

"Oh, god Deacon!"

As her muscles tightened around him, Deacon grasped her waist, lifting her slightly pushing her onto her back. He remained motionless as he hovered above her, keeping his weight in his arms. He began to move again, with quick thrusts. Rayna was still riding out her climax, but she opened her eyes to look up at him. He smiled down at her, still thrusting in and out. When Rayna lifted her leg and looped it around his waist, he leaned in to kiss her. When she captured his tongue with her teeth and lifted her hips slightly, this was all Deacon needed to come over the edge.

"Jesus, Ray," he groaned against her lips. Before collapsing onto the bed, he pulled her towards him rolling their bodies, so they were both lying on their sides.

After a few minutes, they both opened their eyes to look at each other. Neither had yet moved, but finally Deacon broke their connection as he readjusted his legs. They both let out heavy sighs.

"I liked seein that side of you," Deacon smiled as he traced her jawline.  
"What side of me?" She asked, blushing slightly.  
"Well, takin charge Ray. I can remember our younger days. Crazy positions, dirty foreplay. But I got the impression, the last 14 years that wasn't exactly the case."  
"Oh really?" She asked, feigning offense. Then she smiled. "That assumption would be correct. There are a lot of things I used to do with you, and for you, that never happened with Teddy."  
Deacon raised an eyebrow, "what sorts of things are we talkin bout Ray? And will you be bringin 'em back?"  
"Oh you know, lots of things. And I may bring them back. It will depend on how long you can stay off my shit list," she said with a smile.  
"Now Ray, how often have I ever been on your shit list?"  
"Well, if ya keep makin me yell like that, not very often."  
He laughed before leaning in to kiss her. All of this talk was getting him excited again. Rayna could feel the urgency in his kiss and she couldn't help but smile against his lips.  
"Deacon," she sighed, as his hand began traveling her body again.  
"Yes darlin?" He smiled against her lips as his hand found the spot he was looking for.  
"I don't think I've got the energy for round number two quite yet." Her sentence was followed with a heavy gasp as Deacon's quickly began working his magic.  
"Ray, I didn't say anything about round two of sex. I'm just gonna make you..come...again," he whispered between kisses.

Rayna no longer had any defenses. She rolled to her back and closed her eyes, letting herself go as Deacon worked her up to and pushed her over the edge again.

3 hours later  
They had fallen asleep, a tangled mess amongst the sheets. Deacon was flat on his back, Rayna had a leg slung across his waist, lying on her side, her head in the crook of his neck. She woke with one of their old songs stuck in her head. It's Your Love. They had written it in the late 90s, about 4 months before Deacon's fourth trip to rehab. It was an amazing and powerful ballad. That song described them perfectly. Rayna smiled as she thought back to the night that song had been written.

February of 1997  
The tour bus came to a hault back at the Sound Check lot. They had just returned from the middle leg of their tour. 27 cities. Rayna was exhausted and looking forward to nothing more than her bed. But she was not looking forward to sharing it with Deacon at this point in her night. They still weren't speaking after his episode the day before. He had missed rehearsal, shown up 20 minutes late to their final show smelling of alcohol, and he hadn't even apologized. Not to mention, he had a giant shiner beginning to show on his left eye.

Rayna had had to start the show with her solo set, and Steve, the backup guitarist had barely been able to play the songs, let alone play them with style and flare or even begin to understand what harmonizing was. When she had finished the first five songs and made her way back for a wardrobe change, he was coming down the tunnel. He didn't even acknowledge her. Walked straight past her, guitar in hand, relieved Steve and hooked up to the amp. The rest of the show had went off fine. But everyone could see the tension between them.

After the show, Rayna had made her way to her dressing room. She took a seat on the plush sofa and began quietly sobbing into her hand. She didn't have to look up when the door opened to know who was in the room.

"Why Deacon? What happened this time?"  
"I didn't drink Ray." He said flatly.  
"Right, you just show up late, smelling of whiskey, with a black eye starting. But you didn't drink?"  
"It's the anniversary Ray. If you weren't so busy with pickin out dresses, you woulda known. We're in New York, Vince's favorite city. I went to our spot. I sat at the bar and ordered a water. Some guy started givin me shit bout being a cowboy an not drinkin. Well, I wasn't in the mood. He threw his drink on me after I got in his face. Then he hit me. I walked away Ray. But thank you for the faith in me."

With that he had turned and walked away. Rayna, of course had remembered it was the anniversary of Vince's death. But every year, Deacon fell off the wagon on this day. She had decided, this year would be different. Maybe if she didn't say anything, he could make it through. That plan had backfired. That night in their hotel room, she came back to find him asleep on the sofa. When she woke up, he was already gone. On the bus, he wouldn't even look at her. As she collected her luggage and made her way to where they had left his truck, she half expected him to be gone. But there he sat.

She loaded her things in the back and climbed in the passenger seat. He didn't look at her and he didn't say a word. Just put the car in gear and drove. When they reached the house, he got out, collected his things, not even bothering to leave the back hatch open for her. As she got her suitcases and shut the door, she took a deep breath, knowing there was only one way this was going to be resolved. It would involve yelling, and then making up.

Shutting the front door behind her, she dropped her bags and made her way into the kitchen. He was sitting at the counter, twirling his 12 month chip in his hand. He glanced up at her, then back down at the chip.

"Deacon," she sighed, still in the doorway, "how long are you gonna give me the silent treatment."  
"Long as it takes Ray."  
"Til what Deacon?"  
"Til you apologize for instantly assumin I failed you again," he said, his words full of hurt.  
"Deacon," she whispered, "I'm sorry. I just thought, if I didn't say anything about Vince, maybe this time would be different. Maybe we could make it through the anniversary without a fight or worse. And babe, I'm sorry that was my first thought. It's just..you just..scared me."

He knew he had struck a nerve and this made him look up. His words had been sharpened and pointed right at her heart, precisely where they had struck. He let out a heavy sigh. Quickly, he stood and crossed the kitchen.  
He stood one foot from her, his pride unwilling to let him take the next step. As a tear rolled down her cheek, she closed the space, her arms wrapping around his waist as she burried her face in his chest. His defenses had melted by this point. Effortlessly he clutched her waist and lifted her off the ground, her legs wrapping around his waist as he carried her to the couch.  
The next hour had been a flurry of kisses, "I'm sorries," discarded clothing, and passionate love making. When they had finished, Deacon brought out his guitar and they sat on the couch writing into the early hours of the morning. The finished product was a song they had both been proud of. They sang threw it once, as Rayna leaned against him in only his t-shirt, and he in his boxers. The chords still pierced her ears.

_Dancin in the dark, middle of the night. Takin my heart, and holdin it tight. Emotional touch, touchin my skin._

She joined in as they sang the next line.

_And askin you to do what you've been doin all over again._

She let him take over once more.

_Oh it's a beautiful thing. Don't think I can keep it all in. Just gotta let you know, what it is that wont let me go._

Their voices melted together for the chorus, neither one willing to look away.

_It's your love, it just does somethin to me. Sends a shock right through me. I can't get enough. And if you wonder, bout the spell I'm under. Oh, it's, your love._

Rayna's voice faded as Deacon's heart poured out the second verse to her.

_Better than I was, more than I am. And all of this happened, by taking your hand. Who I am now, is who I wanted to be_.

He nodded for her to join in again.

_And now that were together, were stronger than ever happy and free._

She faded once more, watching the emotion pour from his lips.

_Oh it's a beautiful thing, don't think I can keep it all in. And if you ask me why I've changed, all I gotta do is say your sweet name._

After a shaky breath, she joined him once more for the chorus.

_It's your love, it just does somethin to me. Sends a shock right through me. I can't get enough. And if you wonder, bout the spell I'm under. Oh it's, your love._

Rayna let him take the lead on the bride once more as she watched the love in his eyes as he strummed the beautiful chords.

_Oh it's a beautiful thing, don't think I can keep it all in. I just gotta let you know, what it is that wont let me go._

Rayna smiled as he met her gaze for the final chorus.

_It's your love, it just does somethin to me. Sends a shot right through me. I can't get enough. And if you wonder, bout the spell I'm under. Oh, it's, your love. It's your love. It's your love._

And with a final breath, they both sang out the final line.

_It's your love._

As Deacon played the final chord, Rayna couldn't stop herself from what came next. Quickly, she had placed her hands on the guitar in his lap. She had pulled it from him as she stood and placed in on chair. As she smiled down at him, she straddled his lap, brushing her lips against his. Her hands traveled his chest and stomach, until they reached the waistband of his boxers. Quickly she dipped her slender fingers below and took him into her hand. As she began her up and down movement, Deacon grabbed her wrist.

"Ray, what are ya doin? Not that I mind, but it's almost mornin, aren't you tired?"  
"Not quite babe. That song was beautiful. And I wanna show you my thanks."  
"Ray, whadya mean?"

She gave him a devious grin as she began a trail of kisses down his body. When her lips reached his waistband, she peered up at him. His eyes were wide as he simply grinned at her.

"Lift your hips please?" She asked as her hands pulled gently on the material.  
"Ray, you don't gotta..I mean come on. Birthdays, yeah. But right now."

She didn't respond with words, she simply tugged again. He obliged her. Once they were around his ankles, her mouth resumed its trail. When she took him in, he gasped so loudly, she nearly giggled. His hands quickly found their home ruffled in her amber waves as she brought him to his peak. When she finished, she pulled his boxers back up around his waist, as she snuggled back beside him. Smiling, she kissed his chin, and took in the sight of him, head back, eyes closed, labored breathing, and a grin from ear to ear.

Rayna couldn't help but let out a giggle, which she tried to keep quiet, remembering Deacon asleep beside her. Her attempts didn't work however, because Deacon let out a grumble before he spoke.

"What's so funny darlin?"  
"Oh, I woke up thinkin bout the night we wrote, _it's your love_."  
There was silence for a moment and Rayna didnt even have to look to see the grin spread across Deacon's face.  
"Which part? The fight, the make up that led to the song, or your thank you for the song?" He asked with a chuckle.  
"I will give you a hint," she grinned, tracing her hand down his body, until she grasped him, giving him a gentle squeeze.  
"Oh that part," he laughed, "but if I remember correctly, it wasn't your hand that did magical things Ray."  
"Oh really? That you remember huh?" She had now brought her face up to his, meeting his gaze in the moonlight.  
"Pretty fondly, if I'm bein honest."  
"Well, I could make it more than just a distant memory ya know."  
"Now now Ray, don't be makin idle threats."  
"Who said anything about that Deacon?" She smiled, as she kissed him squarely, before beginning a trail of kisses down his chest


End file.
